parenthesised (parenthesised) wrote in kilvites,

Words, words, words

And so the week draws slowly to a close.

It's been pretty damn amazing, if I do say so myself, and everybody else seems to agree, as this post demonstrates. Today Linda-Beth gave a session on writing for reluctant/semi-literate readers, which essentially asked how we would write for Nick, if Nick didn't have swords and cars to keep him busy.

It felt very strange. We were trying to restrict ourselves to words which looked the way they sound (not necessarily common in the English language), with as few sylabbles as possible, and the sentance structures & rhythm felt quite repetative and forced. since I couldn't use my natural rhythm, but apparently it turned out okay. Anyway, I based it very loosely on Kipling's The Smuggler's Song. The asterisks are page breaks, and the overall wordcount is only 171 words.


The men are coming.

They come at night, when the lights go out and the city is dark. They come in the shadows. The men bring death.


The girl stands by the window, looking out. She can see the shadows move. Afraid, she turns away.


Too late. A knife is at her throat. She stays very still, closes her eyes.


“What do you know?”

The man’s voice is hard. He stinks of smoke and beer. .


The girl is quiet, and very scared. What if he rapes her? The men do that. Some people say they rape and kill the girls who get in the way.


“Nothing,” she says at last.

The man laughs.



A door slams shut. A siren starts to wail. Bright red and blue lights fill the room. The girl can hear men shouting.


The man steps back, and is gone. The girl turns around. Shadows move over the room, and she is alone.


The siren wails away. The night is quiet. And the shadow men go by.


I'm thinking of writing a version of Dracula for the same audience. The first sentance? Jonathan Harker had issues.

And, of course, there is the book. The Cuckoo Clock. The wiki of the WIP which we're currently envisioning as a Tim Burton-esque production and which half the energy of the course has been poured into. So far most of the input has come from Helen, but I plan on catching up as soon as I have time by myself to think & envision properly. Do head over and have a read, if you have time or need distracting.


Tags: cuckoo clock, kilvites, kwe, writing
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